Please stop partying.
Over the weekend, cities cracked down on large social gatherings. Los Angeles shut down bars and dine-in restaurants. New York banned gatherings of more than 500 people. On Monday, Trump took it a step further and recommended against gatherings of more than 10 people.
And yet people keep! going! out!
YouTubers Gus Johnson and Eddy Burback are showing people just how selfish they are when they go to parties in the sketch above. Determined to go out, Johnson tells Burback, “Yeah, I’ll go be around my friends and drink and touch ’em all.”
Burback explains that even if Johnson is young and healthy, he can still expose more vulnerable people to the virus. Those who are elderly, immunocompromised, and have chronic health conditions are especially at risk.
“Uhhh scientists are saying people will die with weak immune systems,” Burback cautions.
“Dude let’s go to Atlanta, I saw a ticket and it was $25 today,” Johnson said, dismissing Burback’s concerns. “Usually I spend $25 on Postmates and we can go to Atlanta…I’m going to go home and see my grandpa.”
After some rigorous debate, Burback manages to convince Johnson to stay home — until they hear Barstool Sports founder David Portnoy say it’s OK to go out. (Portnoy received some serious backlash over the weekend for saying that he wouldn’t take social distancing seriously while “nobody under 42” is doing so.)
Anyway, this is what you clowns look like when you risk the safety of everyone around you by partying together. Social distance and wash your hands, people!